no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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