Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
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All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
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Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize