Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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