I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Operation Purity has been aborted
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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