remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize