honey bunches of taint.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
True strength comes from lack of pants
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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