I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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