I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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