he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
We're using joints as your birthday candles
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize