he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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