this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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