If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I have post one night stand depression
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