her vagine was all disorganized.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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