the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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