tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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