Best friends brother. Beat that.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
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