i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize