I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize