is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
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I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
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Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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