wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize