gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize