While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize