i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize