? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
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