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Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
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