break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize