i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
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Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
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We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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