i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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