My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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