I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize