i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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