i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
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