and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
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i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
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Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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