Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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