No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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