plz talk dirty to me
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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