It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Randomize