You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I should be sponsored by Trojan
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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