What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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