Pants 0. Shit 1.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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