Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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