The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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