Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
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hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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