I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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