She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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