he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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