i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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