I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize