so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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