that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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